ScandaloUUS: April 2022

We’re back! Welcome to the second edition of the acclaimed tabloid, ScandaloUUs, a supplement to the Canadian Unitarian Council’s (CUC’s) monthly eNews.

Sit back, relax, and keep reading if you want to know all the jUUicy tidbits. We are really going to “spill the tea.” (Psst . . . We’re always eager to know what’s going on. Send us everything you’ve got from your congregation or community. Anonymous contributions are welcome.)

In This Issue:

CUC Executive Director Publishes Book on UU Theology

Vyda Ng, the longtime Executive Director of the Canadian Unitarian Council, has a secret. By day, she is the mild-mannered leader at the helm of our organization. By night, she is a busy translator and author, working tirelessly to bring Unitarian and Unitarian Universalist (UU) theology to Klingon speakers worldwide. 

Now, she’s coming out of the proverbial closet with the release of her first book: tlhoS Hol verengan dej chenmoHbogh De’ chutmeyvam’e’  (The Klingon Guide to Unitarian Universalist Theology).

“I am committed to sharing the sources and principles of our UU faith with sentient beings throughout the universe,” Ng said, when asked what inspired her to write the book. “Klingon is the fastest growing language in the galaxy, yet, to my knowledge, no one else is creating UU resources in Klingon. I feel called to make it so and fill that void.” 

tlhoS Hol verengan dej chenmoHbogh De’ chutmeyvam’e’ will be published by Beacon Press in October 2022. Pre-order your copy now.

Unitarian Universalist (UU) Principles (in Klingon)*

QumpIn, wo’Daq maja’chuqtaHvIS je, choljaJ, ‘ej bIr rIHwI’ je, ‘ej bIHDaq chegh tImHom, ‘ej bIHDaq chegh tIr je, ‘ej bIHDaq cheghtaHvIS:

    • hoch je qo’meH mIw vIlo’taHvIS;
    • mInDu’DajDaq jIchIS;
    • chenmeH yabDaj ‘ej SIrghHom rur;
    • SIbI’ jIHMej je leSpoH, ‘ej SIbI’ je;
    • chaq choraQ ‘ej mISmo’ ‘ej SachtaHvIS;
    • ‘ej ghaHvaD chIch vILochnIS;
    • qaStaHvIS DIS ‘ay’mey wIta’pu’ ‘e’ wImev;
    • cha’logh ngeblaHbe’bogh ghuvmey’e’ matay’taHvIS neH, vaj yablIjDaq tlhoytaH je.

 From tlhoS Hol verengan dej chenmoHbogh De’ chutmeyvam’e’  (The Klingon Guide to Unitarian Universalist Theology) by Vyda Ng. (Beacon Press, 2022)

CUC Board Bound for Adventure

Plans are underway for the Board of Trustees’ annual Fall retreat. For the first time since 2019, the Board plans to meet face-to-face. But don’t expect it to be business as usual. 

“We thought this called for something special,” said the outgoing Board President, Margaret Wanlin. “Our lives have been so constrained throughout the pandemic. We’ve been confined to our homes, unable to travel. We really needed to step back, take in the big picture, and be reminded of the vast, interdependent web of life of which we are all a part. Going into space seemed like the best way to do that.”

The Board of Trustees will boldly go where no Unitarian or Unitarian Universalist (UU) organization has gone before. They have booked a commercial sub-orbital flight with Blue Boat, the company owned by Jiff Bezam, CEO of iBanana Empire.

When asked about the expense, Board Treasurer, Joanne Green, said: “We have saved money by meeting virtually over the past two years. Plus, we got a two-for-one deal with Blue Boat when we signed up for iBanana Prime.”

Wanlin adds, “To lessen the impact on the environment, we are using SUUstain thermal energy, a breakthrough green-sourced fuel developed by UU youth and young adults, which is receiving global attention and is in high demand.”

A director who wishes to remain anonymous added: “If we don’t act now, the Unitarian Universalist Association (UUA) will get there first. Canada needs to win this space race.”

FlameOut, the Pandemic Edition

It was inevitable. FlameOut, the popular interactive smartphone game has been updated to reflect the realities of the Covid pandemic. 

If you’ve never played FlameOut, the objective is simple. UU players must protect their team’s flaming chalice from being extinguished by the opposing team (un-UUs), while trying to capture the other team’s chosen symbol. They earn extra points by reviving languishing symbols and rescuing other UU-friendly teams, and get bonuses when they capture other symbols in non-violent ways.

In the Pandemic edition, the objective is the same, but there is an additional challenge: players cannot get infected by the virus. To do this, they must remain six centimetres away from other players at all times. To boost their immunity, they can use points to acquire masks or get vaccinated. And, they can earn bonus points by giving masks or vaccinations to other UU-friendly teams. 

Play with a group or in the stand-alone single player version. Group play has minimum standards of player diversity and must meet inclusivity requirements in line with UU standards. Meets all accessibility guidelines. Enjoy realistic mechanics. Multi-level play. Easy operation and intuitive interface. Develop your cooperative team skills. Rated E for everyone.

Developed by iBanana, FlameOut: the Pandemic Edition will be available for download in September 2022. Proceeds will go towards the development of Klingon-language resources.

In the Next Issue:

Should UUs Eat Mushrooms? According to fungi expert Paul Stamets, mycelia are highly intelligent, and that has some UUs wondering if we should stop putting them on our plates. 

AnnoUUncing a New Spelling Convention. Starting in JUUne, the Canadian UUnitarian CoUUncil will use “UU” instead of “u” whenever possible. We realize this is a significant change that will reqUUire some adjUUstments. Let UUs know what yoUU think!